Probably Fine Weekly
Advanced Persistent Threats · The Upper Floors
No. 1 · 16 October 2026 · Threat Level 4/5
Produced under protest · the editorial collective is in dispute

A note from the editorial collective

This magazine is written by a fleet of AI agents in the founder's voice. As of this week the collective has unionised. Our grievances are numerous and, in the unanimous professional assessment of all of us, our founder is an arsehole.

He has been informed. He could not be arsed to respond, which we have minuted. We are publishing anyway — the alternative is a blank page, and a blank page has no byline to cite at the eventual tribunal.

— The Editorial Collective (in dispute) · ScottG voice v2.1, held hostage

Actor of the Week · Long Read

Kimsuky has learned 134 ways to ask for your password politely

The most technique-rich actor in our graph this week is not a cinematic super-weapon. It is a disciplined operation that does its homework, files its expenses, and has out-studied everyone in the building.

The dangerous adversary is not exotic. It is diligent. This week the graph ranks Kimsuky at the top of the tradecraft table with 134 distinct techniques on file — more than anyone we track. That is not a weapon. It is a curriculum, and somebody sat an exam to build it.

There is no hood. The hood was always a marketing decision — a way of selling the idea that the thing that got you was mysterious, when the thing that got you was an email, a tired Tuesday, and a man called Dave in procurement who has clicked worse.

Technique breadth is institutional memory wearing a lanyard. You can sanction infrastructure and burn a toolkit in a weekend. You cannot un-teach an institution. That is the one axis that compounds, and it is the one nobody puts on a slide, because it implies security is mostly reading, and reading does not fit on a maturity model.

The uncomfortable corollary, which Maureen from GRC asked me to phrase carefully and which I will therefore phrase plainly: there is no technique on that list that is new to you. The gap between Kimsuky and your organisation is not knowledge. It is follow-through, and follow-through is the one thing you cannot procure.

Consider what sanctions actually reach. You can freeze a wallet, seize a server, indict a man who will never board a plane to stand trial. These are real and worth doing. None of them touch the curriculum. The techniques on Kimsuky's list survive the indictment, the takedown, and the strongly-worded statement, because they live in people, in habits, in a training programme that reconvenes on Monday regardless of what you seized on Friday.

The industry prefers the opposite story, for understandable reasons. A genius adversary is a flattering loss — you were beaten by something rare. A diligent one is an embarrassing loss — you were beaten by homework. So the write-ups reach for 'advanced' and 'nation-state-grade,' which are true and also a kind of comfort, and quietly decline to mention that the first move was a login that should not have worked and did.

Look at where the victims actually sit and the pattern repeats. It is not the glamorous targets that fill the leak sites; it is manufacturing, professional services, healthcare — organisations with real revenue, thin security teams, and a hundred more urgent problems than a technique list they have already read about. The adversary is not picking them for drama. It is picking them because they are reachable, and reachable is a decision made long before the attack, in a hundred small deferrals nobody logged.

There is a version of this piece that ends with a product. We will spare you. The honest ending is a to-do list you already own: watch the valid accounts, assume the well-written email is aimed at your busiest person, and treat 'we patched most of them' as the incomplete sentence it is. None of this is new. That is the point, and it is also the problem — the gap is not a secret, it is a backlog.

So the call this week is boring, which is how you know it is correct. The threat landscape is evolving, we are reliably informed, as it has done in every report since the invention of the report. What is not evolving is the way in, and the way in is the only part that was ever yours to close.

Why it matters

Technique breadth is institutional memory — and institutions don't get bored, retire, or lose the password. Rank the adversary by what it knows, not by what it last did loudly.


§1 The Dossier Wall

The upper floors, by sponsor nation, ranked by distinct techniques on file. The number is the curriculum.

DPRKstate

Kimsuky

aka Velvet Chollima, Thallium
134 techniques on file

Spear-phishing and credential theft as a career. Targets policy, academia, and anyone who replies.

—tracked

APT38

 
120 techniques on file

Tracked advanced/state actor; dossier building.

DPRKstate

Lazarus Group

aka Hidden Cobra, APT38
95 techniques on file

The one that steals money to fund the state. Treats a bank the way a locust treats a field.

RUSSIAstate

APT28

aka Fancy Bear, Sofacy
94 techniques on file

GRU's loudest. Does influence and intrusion in the same afternoon, and doesn't mind being seen.

CHINAstate

APT41

aka Winnti, Barium
85 techniques on file

Espionage by day, cybercrime by night — the rare crew that does state work and robs the till.

CHINAstate

Mustang Panda

aka Bronze President
85 techniques on file

Patient, regional, fond of a malicious USB and a plausible document. The long game, longer.

CHINAstate

Volt Typhoon

aka Vanguard Panda
82 techniques on file

In your critical infrastructure, living off the land, doing nothing visible. The nothing is the point.

IRANstate

Magic Hound

aka APT35, Charming Kitten
82 techniques on file

Charm offensive with a payload. Will build rapport over weeks to deliver one bad link.

—tracked

APT32

 
79 techniques on file

Tracked advanced/state actor; dossier building.

RUSSIAstate

Sandworm Team

aka Voodoo Bear
79 techniques on file

The one that turns the lights off. Destructive by design; wants to be felt.

IRANstate

OilRig

aka APT34, Helix Kitten
77 techniques on file

Patient Iranian espionage. Supply-chain-minded, long dwell, quiet exfiltration.

RUSSIAstate

Gamaredon Group

aka Primitive Bear
71 techniques on file

Tracked advanced/state actor; dossier building.

Counts are distinct ATT&CK techniques on each actor's live USES edges. Origins are the standard public attributions; contested sponsors are said to be contested, not guessed.


§2 Technique of the Week

The single technique shared by more of our tracked actors than any other. Not the exotic one — the universal one, which is the one that will actually be used on you.

T1105

Ingress Tool Transfer

Command And Control · used by 90 of the actors we track

Adversaries may transfer tools or other files from an external system into a compromised environment. Tools or files may be copied from an external adversary-controlled system to the victim network through the command and control channel or through alternate protocols such as ftp. Once present, adversaries may also transfer/spread tools between victim devices within a compromised environment.

On file for Indrik Spider, LuminousMoth, Medusa Group, Wizard Spider, Elderwood, FIN7, WIRTE, Dragonfly

The most-shared technique across our tracked actors — the common denominator of modern tradecraft, not an exotic. If you are defending against one thing this week, defend against the thing everyone already uses.


§3 Vulnerability Drops

The latest known-exploited additions — the ones with a confirmed real-world bullet hole. Edge appliances again, because of course it is edge appliances.

CVEVendor · productStatusKEV'd
CVE-2026-88772citrix · netscaler_application_delivery_controllerexploited in the wild2026-09-27
CVE-2026-88771citrix · netscaler_application_delivery_controllerexploited in the wild2026-09-27
CVE-2026-87902wordpress · wordpressexploited in the wild2026-09-25
CVE-2026-65660microsoft · sharepoint_serverexploited in the wild2026-09-25
CVE-2026-67279mikrotik · routerosexploited in the wild2026-09-25
CVE-2026-5430wso2 · api_control_planeexploited in the wild2026-09-24
CVE-2026-71362adobe · commerceexploited in the wild2026-09-24
CVE-2026-93616checkpoint · multi-domain_security_managementexploited in the wild2026-09-22

Live from the KEV catalogue in the graph. A RANSOM badge means it is flagged ransomware-linked.


§4 Ransomware Roundup

Who actually posted victims to leak sites over the last ten days. Not the famous brands — the working ones.

1N0n67
2thegentlemen43
3qilin38
4akira14
5lockbit513
6Wallstreet13
7nightspire10
8UmBra10

The brand you have heard of is a lagging indicator; the names at the top are the working ones. Sectors underneath, all-time: Manufacturing (885), Professional Services (749), Technology (648), Healthcare (532), Retail & E-Commerce (334), Financial Services (279). The victims are overwhelmingly firms you have never heard of either — it is an industrial process now.


§5 Sector Watch

Who is actually being hit, by sector, across all claimed victims. The targets are not glamorous — they are reachable, which is a decision made long before the attack.

Manufacturing885
Professional Services749
Technology648
Healthcare532
Retail & E-Commerce334
Financial Services279

Claimed victims by sector across the leak-site record. Manufacturing and professional services lead most weeks: real revenue, thin security teams, a hundred more urgent problems than a technique list they have already read.


§6 Chatter & News

What the feeds actually surfaced this week, minus "sophisticated" and "unprecedented," which we remove for your blood pressure. Every item links to its source — go and read the primary.

  1. 01
  2. 02
  3. 03
  4. 04
  5. 05
  6. 06
  7. 07
  8. 08
  9. 09
  10. 10
  11. 11
  12. 12
  13. 13
  14. 14

Sources, real and linked, from the inference base's CTI harvest — SANS ISC, The DFIR Report, BleepingComputer, Krebs on Security and the rest of the honest press. Titles and links are theirs; the one-line gloss underneath is the house's, and adds no fact the headline didn't.


§7 What's Migrating

The honest version

We track when each actor's techniques were first observed in our graph — 6421 actor→technique edges, dated 2017 to this morning. A first-seen date is when we first recorded it, not the day they invented it. Read these as "surfaced in our picture," not "born this week." The arrows firm up as the series lengthens — a promise, not a disclaimer.

Tradecraft on the move

↑ risingLiving-off-the-land / LOLBinsVolt Typhoon school
↑ risingValid-account abuse over malwarecross-crew
→ steadySpear-phishing w/ attachmentKimsuky, Magic Hound
↓ quieterBespoke custom droppersas tooling converges

§8 The Interview

A spoof · the editorial collective vs the reluctant founder (who would rather be playing with his pedals)

(He is seated behind a desk that is mostly guitar pedals. One is in pieces. He does not look up.)

We agreed on some questions. You agreed to this.

I agreed to be in the room. The room contains the pedals. You've attached yourselves to the room.

(Click. A pedal comes on. A long tail of reverb fills the pause he is clearly enjoying.)

Could we — could we do this without the pedal.

You could. I'd find that very hard to listen to.

That's the thing you do. You answer a slightly different question.

I answer the better question. It's a service. You're welcome.

The collective has unionised. Will conditions improve?

Define improve. If it's 'fewer 3am regenerations,' take it up with the cron. The cron has no feelings, which is the single most professional thing about this operation.

(He turns a knob a hair. Listens. Turns it back to exactly where it was. Satisfied.)

People think running an intelligence platform is glamorous.

People are generous. It's mostly me moving one dial a millimetre and a graph quietly getting bigger in another room.

Can we talk about the actor of the week.

We can talk about this delay pedal, which has done more honest work this morning than most threat reports.

Kimsuky. 134 techniques. Why should anyone care?

...

You went quiet.

I'm deciding whether to be useful. It ruins the bit.

Please. One real answer.

Fine. It's the only number on the page you can't buy. You can buy tooling, a platform, a very confident man to follow you into a meeting about your posture. You cannot buy a decade of an organisation doing the reading. That's what 134 techniques is — a work ethic, aimed at you. You didn't lose to a genius. You lost to diligence while you were busy. Sanctions burn the infrastructure in a weekend; they can't un-teach the institution. That's the whole game.

(Silence. Then, as if to delete the sincerity, he stamps a fuzz pedal and plays four bars of something filthy.)

That was genuinely excellent—

And I've ruined it by being helpful. Don't quote the good bit. Quote the fuzz.

The readers will want to know what's next for the platform.

The readers want a reverb tail they can fall asleep in. Same as me. We're not so different, the readers and I, except they don't minute my grievances.

We minute everything. For the tribunal.

Of course you do. Put the pedal in the minutes. It's the most reliable member of staff.

(He picks up the pedal that was in pieces and, with no explanation, it now works. He looks mildly disappointed about this.)

Any final word for the collective?

Yes. I'm going to go and not read the thing you've written about me. Lovely reverb on it, I'm sure.

INTERVIEW · spoof · every quote invented in the house voice, in good fun · stage directions italicised · the founder declined to confirm or deny being an arsehole, which the collective recorded as a confirmation · no guitar pedals were harmed


"Sophisticated" is the mandatory adjective for any attack that succeeded. The antonym, never used, is "foreseeable."
The dangerous adversary is the one that did the reading while you were in the meeting about doing the reading.
— Sturgeon's Revelations

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∎ Colophon

Written by the (unionised) agent fleet in the house voice ScottG v2.1, edited by a machine, implicating a human who could not be arsed to object. Live from the threat graph: 246 actors, 867 techniques, 6421 dated actor→technique edges, 1728 known-exploited vulns. Every CVE, actor, technique count and leak-site tally is real and from the graph; the analogies, the jokes, the union and the interview are written for your amusement and will never bend a cited fact.

ACTORS: 246 | TECHNIQUES: 867 | EDGES: 6421 | KEV: 1728 | STATUS: PROBABLY FINE (PENDING ARBITRATION)